Have you ever felt like you just didn’t have the energy to do the things you needed or wanted to do – like your gas tank was empty before the day even started? If so, you’re not alone.

People living with chronic illnesses, disabilities or fluctuating energy levels often face this challenge daily. One popular way to think about this invisible energy cost is called spoon theory.

What Is Spoon Theory?

Spoon theory is a simple metaphor created by Christine Miserandino, a blogger living with lupus, to explain what it’s like to live with limited energy. In her writing, she uses spoons to represent units of energy. Every task, big or small, costs a spoon. Getting out of bed might cost one spoon. Taking a shower could take two more. By the time breakfast is over, you might already be down a few spoons.

The thought process is you only have a limited number of spoons each day.

For people with chronic fatigue, pain or other health conditions, this metaphor helps explain why people may not be able to “just push through.” When spoons run out, that’s it –there’s no reserve tank.

“I use it in GROWTH program because it was really important to me to give participants a tool to share what they’re going through because so many people say others don’t get it,” said Dr. Robin Lanzi, Professor and Developer of the NCHPAD GROWTH program.

Using Spoon Theory to Plan Your Day

One of the most powerful tools with spoon theory is how it can help you plan and prioritize daily tasks. Leaning how many spoons you typically have can help you decide what to do – and not do.

“It creates a common ground of understanding and gives us voice on things we’re experiencing that may be difficult to voice,” Lanzi said. “It’s a really good analogy for others.”

Example:
Let’s say you wake up with 10 spoons.

• Getting dressed: 2 spoons
• Making breakfast: 1 spoon
• Going to a doctor’s appointment: 3 spoons
• Cooking dinner: 2 spoons
• Watching a movie with a friend: 2 spoons

That adds up to 10. If something unexpected happens, like a last-minute errand, you’ll need to adjust. Maybe dinner becomes takeout, or you skip the movie. It’s not about being lazy; it’s about using your spoons wisely.

Sharing Spoons with Friends and Family

Spoon theory is also a great way to explain your needs to others. If someone asks you to go out, but you’re already running low, you can say, “I’d love to, but I don’t have enough spoons today.” It’s a gentle, honest way to communicate your boundaries without guilt or needing to explain every detail of your condition.

Friends and family can also learn to ask helpful questions like, “How many spoons do you think this will take?” or “Do you want to save your spoons for something else today?”

This kind of communication reduces misunderstanding, helps prevent burnout and builds empathy.

Planning Around Energy Is Empowering

When you understand and respect your own energy limits, you can make better decisions, avoid overcommitting and build a life that works for you. Spoon theory doesn’t give you more spoons, but it does give you a better way to use them.

And you don’t have to do it alone.

Ready to Grow? Check out the GROWTH Program

The NCHPAD GROWTH Program (Growing Resilience Out of Wellness and Thoughtful Habits), part of NCHPAD Connect, is designed to support individuals with disabilities in building healthy, sustainable routines. Using ideas like spoon theory, GROWTH can help you discover what works best for your body and energy levels on your terms.

Let Spoon Theory be your guide, and let GROWTH be your community. You deserve to thrive, not just survive.